The Other Way Out
The Other Way out...of Suffering
OK, so this is very forced. But I recognize that only coming up with reasons on the suicide column will ultimately convince me to do it. I'm reading "Man's Search for Meaning". I figure if a Holocaust survivor can come up with a reason to live, then I damn well better try to. So... Insight Number 1: "The image of your loved one in your mind will give you the will to go on." Number 2: "So you've lost everything, you can rebuild it all when you get your freedom". Two strikes. No loved one, can't rebuild. I'm not 24 years old like those young men and women. Number 3: Find a meaning in your suffering. OK, well jumping off a 10 story building, just like that, no legacy, no grand accomplishment, just a red splotch on the pavement that wouldn't even be good for organ donations - now that sounds pretty meaningless. So, I think I'll give myself a year and a half to live it up, try to come up with some grand plan that my kids can be proud of. By then, I will have run out of money and I'll either have found something meaningful that makes it worth it to continue or I'll starve and freeze to death, no suicide required.
OK, OK - this first attempt leaves a lot to be desired. But hey, I may have just gained a year and a half of life. Better than a few days ago.
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